Things EVERY True Southerner Knows

The difference between a hissie fit and a conniption fit.

Pretty much how many fish make up a mess.

What general direction cattywumpus is.

That  "gimme sugar" don't mean pass the sugar.

When somebody's "fixin" to do something, it won't be long.

The difference between Yankees and damn Yankees.

How good a cold grape Nehi and cheese crackers are at a country store.

Knows what "Well I Suwannee !!" means.

Ain't nobody's biscuits like Grandma's biscuits !!

A good dog is worth its weight in gold.

Real gravy don't come from the store.

When "by and by" is.

How to handle their "pot likker".

The difference between "pert' near" and "a right far piece".

The differences between a redneck, a good ol' boy, and trailer trash.

Never to go snipe hunting twice.

At one point learned what happens when you swallow tobacco juice.

Never to assume that the other car with the flashing turn signal is actually going to turn.

You may wear long sleeves, but you should always roll 'em up past the elbows.

You should never loan your tools, pick-up, or gun to nobody.

A belt serves a greater purpose than holding Daddy's pants up.

Rocking chairs and swings are guaranteed stress relievers.

Rocking chairs and porch swings with an old person sitting in them are history lessons.

The Ten Commandments of Grits

1. Thou shalt not put syrup on thy Grits
2. Thou shalt not eat thy Grits with a spoon
3. Thou shalt not eat Cream of Wheat and call it Grits for this is blasphemy
4. Thou shalt not covet thy neighbors Grits
5. Thou shalt only use Salt, Butter and Cheese as toppings for thy Grits.
6. Thou shalt not eat Instant Grits
7. Thou shalt not put syrup on thy Grits
8. Thou shalt not put syrup on thy Grits.
9. Thou shalt not put syrup on thy Grits.
10. Thou shalt not put sugar on thy Grits either.

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