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- ACTIVE DESKTOP: Caused from leavin food on yer puter desk.
- BACKUP: What ya do when ya done run'd over a skunk in the woods.
- BAR CODE: Them's the fight'n rules down at the local tavern.
- BIT: A wager, as in, "I bit you cain't spit that there watermelon seed across the
porch over yonder longways."
- BOARD: What ya git when ya aint bizzy.
- BROWSER: What ya do when a purty gal walks by ya in the general store.
- BUG: The reason ya gave fer callin in sick.
- BYTE: What yer pitbull dun to cusin Jethro.
- BYTE: Also the first word in a kiss-off phrase.
- CACHE: Needed when ya run out of food stamps.
- CHIP: Pasture muffins that ya try not to step in.
- CHIPSET: Two piles of dung, usually cowpatties, sittin side by side.
- COLD BOOT: How yer boots are in winter when ya first put em on.
- COMPUTER TERMINAL: Time to call the undertaker.
- CPU: When ya look down and see a cow pattie.
- CRASH: When ya go to Bubba's party uninvited.
- CURSOR: What some guys do when they're mad at their wife and/or girlfriend.
- DIGITAL: The art of counting on yer fingers.
- DISKETTE: A female Disco dancer.
- DOS: Redneck shorthand for: "Dont' own Squat"
- DOT MATRIX: One of them kinky people in them X rated movies yer wife hid from ya.
- DOUBLE CLICK: When the dang gun don't far when ya pull the trigger.
- ENTER: Northern for "Y'all C'mon in!"
- FAX: What ya lie about to the IRS, an yer wife.
- FLOPPY: When ya run out of Polygrip.
- HACKER: Uncle Leroy after 32 years of smoking.
- HARD BOOT: When ya wake up on the floor with a boot under yer ribs after chug testin
grandad's latest batch for smoothness.
- HARD DRIVE: Tryin to climb a steep, muddy hill with 3 flat tires and pulling a trailer
load of fertilizer, or drivin the County road to Grandma's house in the swamp.
- HOME PAGE: A map ya keep in yer back pocket just in case ya git lost out in the field.
- INTERNET: Where cafeteria workers keep their hair.
- KEYBOARD: Where ya hang the keys to the John Deere.
- LAN: To borrow as in, "Hey Jim Bob! LAN me yore truck."
- LAP TOP: Where the little kids & the cat feel comfy.
- LASER: Someone less ambitious than you.
- LINE IN: Whatcha do when you go fishin'
- LOG ON: Makin' the wood stove hotter.
- MAC: Big Bubba's favorite fast food.
- MAIN FRAME: The part of the roof that holds the house up.
- MEGABYTES: A day of good fishin'
- MEGAHERTZ: How yer head feels after 17 beers.
- MICRO CHIP: What's left in the bag when the chips are gone.
- MODEM: What ya do when the grass gits too high.
- MOTHERBOARD: What Mama gets when she ain't got a boyfriend.
- MOUSE: Fuzzy, soft thang ya stuff in yer beer bottle in order ta git a free case.
- NETWORK: Scoop'n up a big fish afore it breaks the line.
- NEWSGROUP: When the wives git together an gossip at the Widder Hawkins' place.
- OFFLINE: When the clothes pins let go an the laundry falls on the ground.
- ONLINE: Where ya stay when takin the sobriety test.
- PROMPT: What you wish the mail were.
- RAM: What ya drive if ya aint a Ford or Chevy man.
- RANDOM ACCESS MEMORY: When ya cain't 'member what ya paid fer the rifle.
- REBOOT: What ya do when the first pair gits covered with barnyard stuff.
- ROM: Delicious when ya mix it with coca cola.
- SCREEN: Helps keep the skeeters off the porch.
- SCREEN SAVER: Repair kit fer the torn winder screen. It's also the paint ya put on your
screen door when it begins to rust.
- SERIAL PORT: A red wine ya drank with yer breakfast.
- SPREAD SHEET: What Momma puts on the bed for a new boy friend.
- SUPERCONDUCTOR: Amtrak's Employee of the year.
- SCSI: What ya call your week-old underwear.
- WARM BOOT: What ya wear on yer feet when it gits cold.
- WINDOW: Place in the truck to hang yer guns. Also what ya roll down when Jim Bob cuts a big un in the truck.
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