
A visitors' guide to DALLAS, TX - Life in America's 5th
largest city!

- First you must learn to pronounce the city name correctly. It is DAH-LUS.
- Forget the traffic rules you learned else where. Dallas has its own version of traffic
rules... Hold on and pray!
- All directions start with, "Go down Beltline"...which has no beginning and no
end.
- The Chamber of Commerce calls getting through traffic a "scenic drive."
- The morning rush hour is from 6:00 to 10:00. The evening rush hour is from 3:00 to 7:00.
Friday's rush hour starts Thursday morning.
- If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will get rear ended.
- Arapaho Road can only be pronounced by a native.
- Construction on Central Expressway is a way of life, and a permanent form of
entertainment.
- All unexplained sights are explained by the phrase, "Oh, we are in Fort
Worth!!"
- If someone actually has their turn signal on, it is probably a factory defect.
- All little old ladies with blue hair in Cadillac's have the right of way.
- Story Road mysteriously changes names as you cross intersections.
- If asking directions in the Irving side, you must have knowledge of Spanish.
- Dallas/Fort Worth International Airport has four terminal buildings connected by one
tram that never works.
- A trip across town will take a minimum of four hours.
- Don't carry money, jewelry, family, etc., on Martin Luther King Fwy.
- The wrought iron on windows near Oak Cliff isn't ornamental.
- Never stare at the driver of the car with the bumper sticker that says, "Keep
honking. I'm reloading."
- Yes, Beltline Rd. is in EVERY city in Dallas County, except maybe
Dallas?


©2000-2003 Beer Bytch Biz